Fisher Price's Pretend Charcuterie Set Is Perfect for Your (Way Too) Fancy Toddler
Remind them to lift their pinky while swigging from their sippy cup.
Is your offspring offended by brightly-colored packages of cereal? Does their lip curl at the thought of a Happy Meal? Are they more likely to ask for a green smoothie than some green play slime? Well then we've found the perfect play set for them.
Fisher-Price's Pretend Charcuterie Snack Set has the high-brow haughtiness that your toddler expects when it comes to their food. Fake aged brie, spicy salami, and whole wheat crackers (all foods your child has likely never, ever requested) are paired together in the set. The entire meal is served on a stylized wooden cutting board with faux marble plates, because going with plain plastic would be a plain disaster for your tiny tyke's stylized kitchen.
Buy it: $19, Amazon.com
But don't forget the grapes! Your toddler is too small to eat the real thing without you going full Edward Scissorhands on it to avoid a choking hazard, but they can pretend to have a larger windpipe while enjoying the plastic versions included with the kit. Pair it with some punny paper napkins, featuring "You're Grape" and "Let It Brie," and they'll be on the fast track to being an ironic hipster by grade school.
The snack set certainly is silly, but it's also quite adorable — and the reviewers agree: "My granddaughter loved it and so did my daughter-in-law who is not easy to impress," one person wrote. Another wrote that the toy, though certainly meant for play, is very realistic: "As a matter of fact, I have that exact pate knife in my kitchen."